A letter to Mom

By Kyle Francis

Dear Mom,

I’m just writing like I told you would, sorry its been so long since my last letter, but it took quite a while for my request for shore leave to go through. I guess I can understand why they didn’t want to let the leave go through, what with me waging war single handedly against evil aliens hell-bent on destroying the earth.

Oh well, I got the leave just in time for Remembrance Day, I guess. I hitched a ride on the Pillar of Winter and got dropped off here in Canada at some strange school or something for a couple of days. I’ve enclosed a few pictures that I managed to get some friendly Canadians to snap of my trip to Canada.

Seeing as it was getting close to Remembrance Day, I took some time to salute the fallen heroes of Canada’s great wars, as well as remember all my comrades that fell to the vicious war with the covenant. GOD DAMN those laser swords.

A definite plus for the trip is that I didn’t have to bust too many heads. I only got in three fights my entire time here! Well, that is unless you count this baby that started trash talking me… I punched it in the face to shut it up but other than that, Canada is definitely one of the more peaceful places I’ve been.

Because I hear this place is famous for it’s tasty beer, I had to head down to one of the nearby pubs and grab a drink. After I finished my drink, I met these gangsters at the bar and they made me an honorary member of the gang! I always wanted to fit in like this, but it’s always been so hard with this stupid battle armor that I can’t take off. Oh well, I cant blame most guys for feeling threatened by a big guy in nigh-indestructible green war gear that carries dual submachine guns all the time.

I guess I am handsome just like you always said, Ma! Three of these wild Canadian girls found me and couldn’t keep their hands off of my chiseled steel plates for the rest of the time I was there! I love this country!

Oh well Mom, this is all I have time to write for now. I hope your doing well in the zeta quadrant; send everyone my best. I’ve got to run so I can catch a rendezvous with another space ship and keep on with my crusade to smash the evil alien scum. Like I always said, nothing says Remembrance Day like killing aliens.

Your Son,

Master Chief

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