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Contributors:
Diltaj Atwal • Tamara Cottle • Reem Ghaleb • Fatima Ghanem • Grace Elekwa • Liv Ingram • Jenny Lau • Timothy Louden • Emily Macphail • Jack Middleton • Josh O’Brien • Jan Ong • Matthew Parkinson • Kayla Ross • Salman Abdellah • Erin Schumlich • Allison Seto • Tina Shaygan • Mike Soikkeli • James Stevenson • Robyn Thomas • Justine Wright • • • We found Ashton Chugh making goat’s cheese in a cave tucked away near the Swiss Alps. When we asked him what he was doing there, he claimed to be searching for the love of his life who had been kidnaped by a biolumiscent talking whale named Jericho. When we asked him to join our news crew, he surprised us by skiing effortlessly down on a pair of moleskin skis screwed together by shards of a broken whiskey bottle. He wrote three news articles before he reached the bottom of the hill, and this athleticism led to him being named Sports Assistant and Golden Spatula winner of the week.