Immigrants tend to get the blame in today’s society for most of our problems be they cultural, social or economic. We hear a lot about “too many immigrants,” terrible foreign drivers and the problems with gangs. The headlines of the Calgary Sun over the last week have been filled with doom laden opinions about gangs taking over. Talking to Calgary residents leaves you with the view it is immigrants who are the cause of this.
At the heart of this problem is the idea that “foreigners are annoying.” They show up speaking their odd languages, and they do things, well… funnily. Lots of them even look different. In Calgary alone, visible minorities represent 17.5 per cent, which doesn’t even include those damned white europeans who flock here in droves. In Toronto and Vancouver the visible minority population is set to reach 50 per cent by 2016.
The fact that all Canadians, excluding the First Nations people, are all recent immigrants seems to have escaped a lot of people. Sure, Uncle Jim-Bob McCleod is awfully proud of the fifth generation Scottish heritage you’ve got, despite the fact he wouldn’t know Scotland from Lapland, but mention immigrants and you can be guaranteed he’ll be as Canadian as the Rocky Mountains.
As an immigrant to the land of Bears, Mountains, Maple Syrup, Hockey and the coldest fucking weather this side of Pluto, you quickly realize that despite the ethnic mixture, plenty of Canucks don’t like Johnny Foreigner, even if he isn’t ‘Thank the Maple Leaf’ an American.
“At least you speak English!” Sandra, a local Video Store Clerk quipped, with an undertone of fist shaking at non-English speakers who dare to set foot on hallowed Albertan soil.
This immigrant loathing is certainly not exclusive to Canada, who are amateurs in comparison to the grandfathers of elitism and exclusion, the British. Immigrant bashing in jolly old England has almost reached a ‘grab pitchforks and burning torches’ threat level. Pick a malady, be it recession, high taxes, unemployment or global warming and you can be damn sure those immigrants are behind it. The British Daily Mail simply inserts any gloom-laden headline around the words ‘Asylum Seekers.’
When looking to blame immigrants for problems, Canadians should consider the facts about emigrating to Canada. It can take up to four years to process the paperwork required to obtain “Landed Immigrant” status. Even those marrying a bona fide Canadian must complete 12 months of paperwork and undergo stringent medical screening. Additionally, most immigrants to Canada are granted residency on the back of exemplary qualifications and work experience, not to mention sizeable bank balances. What kind of country wouldn’t want highly educated and qualified people to come and boost the economy?
Criticism of immigrants tends to reflect the fears and prejudices of a nation and is often harshest on the largest immigrant group. In Canada, the Asian community comes under attack the most for their differences, or just for being Asian. In England, it’s the Indian community who make up the largest percentage of immigrants and suffer proportionally.
Those of us who listened to Troy McClure, upped sticks and headed for “Bovine University” have mixed experiences. Newcomers to the U of C can find the place a little daunting. The Calgarian’s breeze into class and out again, often disappearing back into the ether of work, home or friends, sparing little thought for the poor old immigrant and their lonely existence. Perhaps we should start a new campaign, “Hug an Immigrant Today,” and then maybe they’ll learn enough English to thank you for it.
Immigrants, on the other hand should enlist for maple leaf tattoo’s, Flames t-shirts, drink beer, drive an SUV and worship regularly at the Church of Tim Hortons. They should practice being super nice and calling their wooly hats a “Toque.” All of which should at least disguise their origins and ingratiate them to their Canadian hosts.
The immigrant nay-sayers were right about one thing, though; immigrants are to blame for global warming. The source can be traced back to my yard, in which a pile of old fridges is burning merrily in the hope of creating a hole in the ozone layer, bringing some much needed sunlight to Canada’s 17 months of fucking winter.