Opinions

Letter: Heathens!

Publication YearIssue Date 

Re: "Apalled by anti-abortionists," letter, Oct. 26, 2006]

It's not enough that Robert Collins made a decision to ignore God's commandments, refuse to trust Him, and kill the child God gave him. Now he has to spread it all over the campus paper, justifying it with a lot of words demonstrating that he worships himself, not God. What in God's name is wrong with you people? Do you have an ounce of fear of God whatsoever? Why don't you shut your mouths and obey? Why don't you stop wallowing in your proud sin? Do you really think all this maudlin hyperbole that extols the virtues of the human heart, and focuses on your pathetic human plans and desires, is going to wash with God on that Great and Terrible Day of Judgment? [sic] The human heart, according to the scriptures, is desperately wicked and deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9). Stop worshiping yourself and start worshiping God.

The problem with the pro-life demonstrators is not that they simply showed the real picture of what happened to that murdered baby--so people would stop jabbering about "pro-choice"--but that each one of them is probably embroiled in his or her own proud sin, and this protesting is simply their form of works of righteousness. In other words, the proud blind sinner leading the proud blind sinner.

Collins is the face of [North] America--a disobedient cry baby! He wants to live for the devil, but if anyone dares point it out, he whips out his thesaurus so he can throw a big temper tantrum trying to pretend words that upset him should be silenced. God hates America!

Margie Phelps

picketing member of Westboro Baptist Church, Topeka, Kansas

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Comments

I'm besides myself as to whether this is an incredible piece of satire from within the Gauntlet office or actually a letter from somebody who is clearly bat-shit insane.

I wish I could take credit for this masterpiece, but it didn't come from us. Either someone on or around campus has a great sense of satire, or we've officially hit the Westboro Baptist radar.

Considering that the email address for the Westboro Baptist Church is actually www.godhatesfags.com/main/index, I'm inclined to believe that this astonishing letter is both geniune and sincere.