2001-10-04

    
Publication YearIssue Date 
  2001-10-04

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October 04, 2001
  Lemmings march, all aflamePDF files may take a moment to load

It's apparently a bit too easy to get into the University of Calgary. Our slack-assed, come-one-come-all 100-per-cent-apathy-or-your-money-back philosophy makes it possible for any half-witted, bucktoothed, slack-jawed ninny to grace the crumbling halls of our fine insitution.

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October 04, 2001
  No one wins on a dry campusPDF files may take a moment to load

From a distance, it looks like a mob of 12-year-olds awaiting A.J.'s release from rehab. As one walks closer, the 12-year-olds start aging and the music heard beyond them isn't that of a crappy top-40 boy band. Rather it's the sweet, soothing rhythms of Sublime. Then it comes into view. Over the heads of the seething mass of university students, a sign reads "Den Bottle Shop." One can only stand with the rest and a long, fruitless wait begins.

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October 04, 2001
  University is a place to figure it outPDF files may take a moment to load

We're nearly a month into the school year and most of us have finally settled in. Some of us know what to expect from this institution and what it expects from us. However, for many others, the overwhelming magnitude of university hasn't set in and it may not for years to come. And that's okay.

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October 04, 2001
  Sticks, stones and broken bonesPDF files may take a moment to load

A lifetime of violent media has made me a difficult person to shock. Despite this, I can't help but be surprised by a statement made in the Calgary Herald this Monday by a member of the university faculty.

It was in an article about Co-
Motion's training camp, a place where people learn effective techniques for protesting the upcoming G-8 summit. It all sounds perfectly innocuous to me, with the organizer stressing non-violent protest as a means to influence policy. Just like Gandhi.

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October 04, 2001
  Irony is infinitePDF files may take a moment to load

Reports of the death of irony have been greatly exaggerated.

I'm not talking about the kind of irony you learned about in your high school English class. I'm talking about a style of humour referred to as "Gen-X irony" by the media in their erroneous reports of its death.

"Why did they do this?" you might
be asking yourself. "Is it not in times of great duress that our need for humour is
greatest?"

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October 04, 2001
  The good, the bad and the uglyPDF files may take a moment to load

Don't let lazy 20 C days fool you--it's almost winter. While Canadian summers mean beer and patios, winters mean beer and hockey. And October means another National Hockey League season is about to begin.

Mario is back for a whole year (hopefully), Peter Forsberg has no spleen and the Islanders are performing "Stupid Human Tricks" that would make Letterman proud. All these thoughts and musings are for later though, as hockey is unequivocally Canadian and we still have six teams in the league.

October 04, 2001
  Volleyball appetizerPDF files may take a moment to load

While the Province of Manitoba may represent an appalling lack of civilization to some, volleyball fans got some relief with a pre-season tourney at the University of Winnipeg last weekend.

The Dinos men's volleyball team travelled east to play the hosts as well as the University of Saskatchewan, University of Toronto and University of Regina. And while the Dinos finished third out of the five teams, both the coaching staff and players agreed it was healthy for the team.

October 04, 2001
  How do you spell relief?PDF files may take a moment to load

There seems to be no rhyme or reason to this year's Dino football team.

After back-to-back weeks of serious punishment on the road, the crew bounced back last Friday night at McMahon Stadium to stun the previously unbeaten second-ranked team in the nation, the Regina Rams, in a 35-33 nail-biter. And while he may not have come right out and said it, even Dinos Head Coach Tony Fasano was pleasantly surprised by the victory.

October 04, 2001
  A new force in the universePDF files may take a moment to load

At 7:30 a.m. Saturday morning, most of us were sleeping off hangovers. The exception to that rule is the University of Calgary men's soccer team. While the rest of the world tossed, turned and stumbled to the toilet, our pitch warriors were boarding a bus for a high noon showdown with the University of Lethbridge Pronghorns.

October 04, 2001
  A solid mix of Heaven and HellPDF files may take a moment to load

There are faint outlines of an angel and a devil sitting on Katie Lee's shoulders.

The angel is quietly paging through an engineering textbook, dressed in a comfortable hoodie with a look of innocence common to the divine. The devil is restless, shifting and adjusting a red soccer uniform while juggling a ball with a malicious smirk.

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