Soccer

    
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  Soccer
October 31, 2002
  Streaky Dinos sneak into post seasonPDF files may take a moment to load

When I typed "the Dinos lost a game to Lethbridge," the grammar check on my computer said "no." No one loses to the Lethbridge Pronghorns, even Microsoft knows that. They are the Faroe Islands of Canada West men's soccer--they're the sure win, the weekend off, the guaranteed points.

But tell that to the Dinos who managed to actually lose a game 2-1 before they beat the Pronghorns 6-0 a day later.

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October 31, 2002
  What's wrong with the lady Dinos?PDF files may take a moment to load

If you had a chance to watch the lady Dinos play volleyball last season then you probably expected to see them kick some ass. Ninety per cent of the time you would not be let down.

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October 24, 2002
  Dinos trade crotch kicks with West Coast rivalsPDF files may take a moment to load

When you lose two games in a row by a combined margin of 11, you're bound to get angry. When you're Andrew Zakaluzny from the Dinos men's soccer team, you take out that anger on some poor guy's crotch.

Zakaluzny, also known as "Diggler," scored two goals for the Dinos last weekend, one in a dismal 6-1 loss to the University of British Columbia Thunderbirds, and one in a 2-2 draw against Victoria. The Victoria goal was especially bizarre.

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October 24, 2002
  Dinos smell playoffs, taste nothingPDF files may take a moment to load

All week Head Coach Robin Slot's emotions meandered between extremes. He was like the Incredible Hulk: "Slot angry!" one day, "Slot satisfied!" the next.

But this was not unfounded. The beleaguered "Slot Machine" lost his only goalkeeper to a concussion on Wednesday, beat the top-ranked team in Canada on Saturday, and saw his team lose to an easier opponent the very next day.

To sum up his week: "Slot confused!"

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October 10, 2002
  Soccersaurs shamed by Golden BearsPDF files may take a moment to load

6 bloody 0? 6 #$%@ 0? I don't even know where to begin.

The Dinos men's soccer team got taken to the woodshed twice this weekend, first by the Saskatchewan Huskies (who suck) and then by the University of Alberta Golden Bears who murdered them 6-0.

The Dinos began their weekend with a 1-0 loss to the Huskies, a team they should have beaten soundly. Last week Head Coach Andy Gibbs mentioned Lethbridge

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October 03, 2002
  Fortune is Belgian, God eats wafflesPDF files may take a moment to load

The history of Belgian soccer is riddled with great names like Jean-Marie Pfaff, Marc Wilmots and the cruel King Leopold II. The Belgians terrorize their opponents with laser-like precision, no doubt a by-product of indoctrination by their ruthless diamond-cutting industrial complex.

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September 26, 2002
  To Vancouver and Victoria and backPDF files may take a moment to load

I think we expected Fear and Loathing in Vancouver. When Sports Editor Mike Attersall and I stepped on board WestJet flight 33, we weren't armed with pills and booze but we may as well have been. We had money, which was just as good, and we had high expectations. We were young, resourceful, intelligent, independent, and really, really, ridiculously, good looking. We were also on a crash course with some great company--the Dinos men's and women's soccer teams were in town for their annual three game West Coast swing.

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February 07, 2002
  Dinos will have to get over the HillPDF files may take a moment to load

Finishing your fifth season with Dinos athletics is a lot like turning 40. You start noticing the snap, crackle and pop every time you stand up, you talk about your rookie season like it was a simpler time long ago and all those stories that people respectfully kept to themselves start surfacing.

Yes, the public eye can be both a blessing and a curse. And now the time has come to shine the collective spotlight on a departing defender of the Dinos men's soccer team: Colin Hill.

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