Local thespians, flamboyant homosexuals and furries alike finally have a reason to celebrate as the seminal off-Broadway production, Cats the Musical, returns to our fair city next week for a highly anticipated run on nine shows. Though the run is paltry compared to the 8,949 shows the musical staged in London, many Calgarians are eagerly awaiting the show's debut. Some, such as local furry and generally disturbing individual, Larry Balombolee, are even planning parties.

"America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization."

-Georges Clemenceau

Well I just heard the news today

It seems my life is going to change

When Scott Stapp, the former front man of the Christian rock band Creed, penned those words, he probably had no idea one day he'd wake up and find the video of him and Kid Rock having sex with four strippers. For a Christian rocker, this amounts to career suicide.

March 22 was World Water Day, and in case you missed out on the fun, it's not too late to be aware of water issues. It is fitting that we are concerned with water issues every day, since we require water on a daily basis to survive. The theme of this year's World Water Day was water and culture. Water has many varied uses in many cultures and religions worldwide, such as baptism and different forms of purification.

Poor President Bush is always a victim of the spin and filter of a left-wing media. Sometimes quotes from the greatness of a president need translation into layman terms. For anyone and everyone ever confused by the oratory greatness of George W. Bush, here is a helpful guide. The quotes below are word for word from the mouth of the leader of the world's most powerful country. Be afraid.

"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"

University of Calgary student Brent Kettles will be able to afford gourmet mac'n'cheese next semester after winning the first Student Initiative Competition.

The Students' Union prized Kettles with a free semester of tuition at the first Student Initiative awards ceremony, Mon., Mar. 20.

Kettles won with his proposal for the creation of a student financial education and assistance office, where students can find a variety of financial services, ranging from budgeting and scholarships to crisis counselling.

The University of Calgary Students' Union has approved $100,000 of quality initiative money towards the on-going renovation in the Social Sciences walkway.

Described within a university document as the University of Calgary's "poor cousin on the lookout for welfare," the arts at the U of C, and the faculty of fine arts in particular, have long been associated with the worst of what can happen when budgets are slashed, staff reduced and programs cut.

Editor, the Gauntlet,

I regularly surf a Calgary based car enthusiast forum called Beyond. The forum isn't limited to the discussion of cars, though, and there are many subsections which encourage the discussion of a much wider range of topics. One section is labeled Campus Chat, and I came across a disturbing thread.

AUPE Local 52 logo makeover

The Alberta Union of Provincial Employees Local 52 is calling on students and union members with a flair for the artistic to design a new union logo. In true union fashion, members will vote on the submitted logos, and the winning designer will receive $500 for their efforts.

Submissions should be easy to reproduce and should reflect AUPE Local 52 members and the University of Calgary.