From The Editors

Publication YearIssue Date 
  From The Editors
October 28, 1999
  QB's make us whole againPDF files may take a moment to load

Have you recently found yourself cheering for the San Francisco 49ers? About a year ago, did you find yourself cheering for the Buffalo Bills? You're not alone: you may be one of thousands of Calgarians doing the very same thing.

Get over yourselves, "football fans." Doug Flutie and Jeff Garcia don't live here anymore. They don't have a little horsey tattooed on their respective bums. Chances are, neither of them remembers Calgary. Wait: Garcia might--he still owns a restaurant here.


October 21, 1999
  Reform seeks like-minded party for good timesPDF files may take a moment to load

Except for those nose-counting lovers of freedom, the Youth 4UA vanguard, haven't we heard enough about uniting the right? Daily updates on the United Alternative have hit maximum saturation considering the new party is almost universally dismissed as impossible or pointless.

After six months of disinterest from Joe Clark, UA strategists began attacking him as anti-democratic. Translation "Why doesn't he like us?" This plays out very desperate.


October 14, 1999
  Minister of Learning is no damn goodPDF files may take a moment to load

Last summer, a new term came to lips of Alberta citizens: The Ministry of Learning.

What does this newspeak term actually mean? Besides being a transparent "proactive" term, it's a really stupid, and probably dangerous, way to think about education.

What does this comprise? Advanced education (previously a ministry all to its own) is now lumped in with education concerns from kindergarten to grade 12. You may remember some problems that keep arising in the k-12 area of education.


October 07, 1999
  Lies, damn funny liesPDF files may take a moment to load

The following is completely false.

The University of Calgary Students' Union stunned the transportation industry yesterday when it announced it was buying out Canadian Airlines International and moving its base to the university.

"We are pleased to announce that the SU has sent a proposal to Canadian Airlines," said SU President Rob South. "By buying the corporation and moving it to campus, it's a wonderful opportunity for our organization to expand beyond merely serving students at ground level."


September 30, 1999
  Pride at U of C?PDF files may take a moment to load

Let me relate an utterly fascinating story.

Walking through Mac Hall the other day I couldn't help but laugh as some poor sap walked by wearing a University of Calgary sweatshirt. "Look, school pride!" I hissed to a friend. After we finished laughing hysterically, we grabbed a Pepsi and sat down sighing.

Hours later, another thought occurred to me. What the hell were we laughing at?

Can't someone express pride in their university? Shouldn't they?

Here's how it's supposed to work.


September 23, 1999
  U of T, a drug company whorePDF files may take a moment to load

September 23, 2014. Bullets scream through the air above. I've been in this putrid, rot-ridden hole for over three years, and things have only gotten worse. They have continuously weakened our lines; forward positions now mix with their fronts in a thousand places. These fronts are thus extremely dangerous; support to such places is ghastly thin. I expect to perish soon.

How much power does money convey? Enough to sway an entire institution whose mandate is academic expression and education?


September 16, 1999
  History proves APEC protesters correctPDF files may take a moment to load

Ever since the Prime Minister committed peace keepers to East Timor, I've been starting to think that those APEC protesters may have had a point.

You remember APEC don't you? The Asian Pacific Economic Conference and the resulting scandal that held our nation's fickle attention for a few shining months (give or take a few) almost two years ago.


September 09, 1999
  Beyond 101PDF files may take a moment to load

Hey big roller, I've got some odds for you on the next school year. Looking for a good bet? It's all right here, baby. Right here.

See, in my wisened state-imbued through years of study at this institution-I know certain things are inevitable in a school year. Certain things happen every year that piss us off, enrage us and make us want to dent our skulls on a wall. Think of this as your hand guide to the bullshit of a year at the University of Calgary.

Bet #1: We will laugh at frosh. Odds: 30:1



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