By Lil’Dong
Clouds of dust and 40 minutes was all it took to bring about the end of the Gauntlet’s 40-year-long, Room 310 MacEwan Hall era.
On Fri., May 4, a crew of stalwart movers packed up the former Gauntlet office supplies and shuffled them down the hall to the other side of the building.
"It’s so sad," sniffled a tearful Вen Li, incoming Web Editor. "I spent years arranging the dust bunnies in that office to my liking."
Other members of the Gauntlet crew were more phlegmatic over the change.
"Bah!" said News Editor Ruth Davenport, who was later seen using Pringles potato chips to emulate a goose.
The new Gauntlet offices are located in the former site of the Ray Alward Lounge, which one misguided Students’ Union member called "valuable meeting and lounge space." When reminded that MacEwan Hall expansion will contain meeting space to house a small army and that U of C students don’t need a designated lounge space to lie around doing nothing, the official in question rapidly performed a 180-degree turn and fled in terror.
Gauntleteers expressed delight over the new location of their offices, particularly the close proximity to the new "NOT-the-Den."
"We’re contemplating getting a dumbwaiter to run up and down the stairs to bring us refreshments when we’re tired," explained Buzzard James Keller.
Opinionated tyrant Lawrence Bailey went on to explain that "dumbwaiter" did not refer to a tray-and-pulley system, but rather to a waiter who is dumb.
Viking love child Andrew Ross was quick to point out another advantage of the new space.
"We’re right across the patio from the SU offices!" he exclaimed eagerly. "Midnight raids, here we come. Or we could just pelt them with peashooters and rubber anvils. Too bad we’re too far away for easy leg- humping."
New Dictator-in-Chief (DIC) Michael Leung did not forsee any problems with adjusting to the new space on the other side of MacEwan Hall.
"Our first issue is on schedule, the dust bunnies are copulating normally and our disco ball survived the move, so there shouldn’t be any negative impact on our productivity," he said. "Besides, Gauntlet writers have a lot of experience with the other side, so this move is barely a glitch on the Gauntlet Efficiency Radar."