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Debunking myths of a sexual nature

No, splooshing your junk in Diet Coke will not prevent pregnancy

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The basics of sex are essentially instinctual. But with a little bit of creativity and practice people can usually figure out the more complicated stuff, too. Unfortunately the contraceptive ideas some creative people come up with can be pretty ridiculous. Sex myths may be hilarious, but when people believe them they can lead to some undesirable side effects. Babies, for example. So we have dug up the truth about some of the better known and outrageous sex myths.

Myth: You can't get pregnant during unprotected sex if the man pulls out before he ejaculates.

False! Even if the dude doesn't ejaculate, sperm can still be present in his pre-cum. And yes pre-cum exists, too, it's not something your third period CALM teacher made up to scare you. It's the clear, sticky substance that is released when a guy is aroused. You're also gambling that the guy has enough control to know exactly when he's going to burst. It just takes one little sperm to ruin all your fun.

Myth: Wearing two condoms makes you safer! It's like you're 200 per cent protected!

False! Condoms work because they provide a protective barrier between your naughty bits and your partners naughty bits. There is no reason to add in an extra condom. Using two causes more friction between the condoms than between your junk and a condom. This is caused because condoms don't self lubricate like you do. The increased friction from the extra rubber makes both condoms more likely to break or fall off. If you're worried about condom breakage don't use two, grab some lube instead, you can even get it in convenient condom-sized packets!

Myth : You can't get pregnant while having sex standing up, girl on top or the upside-down lotus.

False! As most physics majors will tell you, gravity revolves on a "what goes up must come down" set of principles. However, this does not mean that you won't get pregnant just because you are riding bareback on top. That's just silly. Sperm is still able to travel up the vaginal cavity to the uterus. If you have unprotected sex you can get pregnant, no matter how or where you do it.

Myth: Peeing after sex washes out sperm and prevents pregnancy.

False! Urine exits the bladder through the urethra, which lies above the vaginal opening. They are not the same tract. If you are peeing through your vaginal opening, see a doctor. A good one. Since sperm does not connect with the urethra, any sperm in the vagina won't even get wet when you wee.

Myth: Washing your genitals with Coke (or Pepsi at the U of C) after sex can kill sperm and thus prevent pregnancy.

The belief used to be that warm Coke, and especially Diet Coke, was an excellent spermicide. Directly following sex, the girl would take a warm bottle of Coke and shake it well. Once shaken, the tip and neck of the bottle would be inserted into the vagina and the carbonation would force the Coke upward into the vagina. It was thought that the carbonation and sugar would kill sperm. It will only cause a really bad infection.

Myth: If you have sex in water (like a swimming pool or shower) the chlorine will kill sperm and STIs. False! While chlorine in a pool can kill sperm and some germs, it is not concentrated enough to kill most bacteria or all the sperm. There is the risk that during submerged sex, water can be forced into the cervix, providing a breeding ground for infections. Water is also a poor lubricant and can rinse away your natural secretions. This makes it more likely that both partners can get micro-abrasions and tears in their equipment. These tears are not just painful but create additional routes for nasty infections to get into your body. Save yourselves some hassle and if you must have sex in water, keep it in the shower and use lube.

Myth: If you ejaculate three times in a row then you've gotten rid of all of your sperm and can't get someone pregnant.

While you could theoretically exhaust your supply of man batter, it would take a hell of a lot more than three spurts. The whole point of the male reproductive system is to make and deliver sperm, and by the time it runs out, you wouldn't want to be having anymore sex anyway. Even if your loads are getting smaller it still only takes one.

Sex myths can be crazy, fun to laugh about, and there are several more that we didn't have space for here. So keep your brains turned on, even in the heat of the moment. Sexual safety is important to both the newbies and the senior sexters. While the picture of a woman and a coke bottle is both hilarious and horrifying, keep in mind that in Amsterdam, women smoke cigars out of their vaginas and write sentences through pelvic thrusting and a strategically placed marker. If you have any equally intriguing stories, or just want to let us know your take on things, feel free to contact us through campuscoitus@hotmail.com.

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